Friday, November 9, 2012

Day 16: Trade Complaints for Compliments

Hi Team Gratitude,

Today let’s trade our complaints for compliments!  The world may seem to be full of things to complain about (laundry, red lights, screaming kids, dirty car), but if we truly stop our busy lives, take a deep breath, and look around, we will see that there are hundreds, no millions, more things to be thankful for than things to complain about. 

The dictionary defines these two words as follows:

·         Complaint: an expression of discontent, regret, or grief
·         Compliment: an expression of praise, respect, and admiration

When you read these two definitions, what feelings do they evoke in you?  The words “discontent, regret, and grief” create in me feelings of sadness, stress, and gloom. But the words “praise, respect, and admiration” all make me want to smile, creating feelings of joy, love, and happiness.  Would you rather live your days surrounded by sadness, stress, and gloom, or you would you rather live a life of joy, love, and happiness? That’s an easy answer for me! Now the choice is yours, and only yours, as you are the ultimate decision maker for your own words and thoughts.

Let’s look at our word “trade out” for today with real life examples:

Situation #1:

·         Complaint: “Our house is mess, there is laundry everywhere, dishes are piled up, and the carpet has stains on it.”
·         Compliment: “I am blessed to have a home to live in with sturdy walls, a roof, heat, and a bed to sleep in.”

Situation #2:

·         Complaint: “I have to drive my kids to so many events every day, and my husband is never around to help out.”
·         Compliment: “I am thankful that I have healthy kids are able to be involved in activities and a husband that has a job to provide for our family.”

Life may not ever be perfect, but how we respond to our daily imperfections will define our happiness. Choose today to compliment, not complain! Each time a complaint enters your mind, stop for moment, and just be quiet. Give the complaint time to leave your body, and turn it into a compliment instead.  Happiness is just a “trade out” of words away! 

CHALLENGE: Embracing the importance of “trading complaints for compliments”, here is a tangible challenge for all of us.  We started the “All Compliments, No Complaints Jars” with our family this week, and it is amazing how well it works (for them as well as ME and my husband)! Here’s how to do it…

“All Compliments, No Complaints Jars”:

1.      Designate two jars, cups, or small containers for each member of your family (at least everyone old enough understand complimenting and complaining), that includes you!
2.      On one container, write the word “compliments” and on the other one “complaints”. 
3.      Decorate your containers any way you want (which is fun too!). 
4.      Then together decorate another container and filled it with quarters (or pennies, dimes, nickels, whatever you have around).
5.      Every time anyone says a compliment (expression of praise, respect, admiration) or does a complimentary or nice action for someone else, they get to put a quarter in their compliment jar.  Every time anyone says a complaint (expression of discontent, regret, grief), they have to put a quarter in their complaint jar. 
6.      On Thanksgiving Day, each family member will be given all of the quarters in their compliment jar and be able to buy themselves any prize that want with it.  The money in their complaint jars will be given away, and each family member will choose a charity or someone in need to donate it to.    

Attached are a few pictures of our jars.  This is a great project to do with the whole family, but even if you don’t have kids, this is a meaningful project for everyone to do.  I think that I am learning as much, if not more, than my kids about the power of my words through the “All Compliments, No Complaints Jars.”

This morning, I was asking the kids again to explain to me the importance of our words and what the project of the “All Compliments, No Complaints Jars” meant.  Our four year old Harrison enthusiastically said, “Mommy, it means no grumpy words, all happy words!” I loved that explanation and told them that this would be our new motto for our words for now on.

So today and every day, let us all strive to live out Harrison’s motto and have “no grumpy words, all happy words”!

Blessings for a complaint-free day!

Your grateful friend,

Amy

“From the fruit of his words, a man eats good things.” (Proverbs 13: 2a)
 

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